She’s like a ghost. She’s there and then she’s not. At one moment she’ll be in the kitchen and then the next in her room, or not even at home at all. She’ll sneek up on you and say “Hi baby Aslin!” with a large smile on her face.

We were able to obtain this rare photo of her holding you. We’re not sure how this image came about, but it is definite proof that she does exist.

Your #3 Sister Ketura came home, Thursday, July 13. Same day as Jared’s birthday. She took a liking to you right away. You two just seemed to connect right away. You cooed and smiled at her while she held and talked to you. And she loved holding you. When daddy was holding you, she would come out to nowhere and say hi to you and smile at you. She seemed to jump at the chance to hold you. That made me feel so happy.

I know I keep changing the voice of this blog, but now I figure that I’m really writing this blog to you, my precious little girl. Not really anyone else, even though they’re welcome to read it.

So you met your G-Pa/Gung-Gung (grandfather on the mother’s side in chinese) for the first time July 9, 2006. He’s a Harley Davidson bike riding man from head to toe. A big guy with a big heart. He’s one of the most kind hearted man I’ve ever met. He tells the greatest stories and loves fishing. I wish he lived closer to us so you could be around him more.

He came down with your Auntie Mary and her son’s, your cousins, who also met you for the first time. They all thought that you were beautiful. Which is totally true. And I bet you still are. It’s your mother in you, even though people say that you look like me. It was the first time you’ve been around so much of your mother’s side of the family, since most of them live so far from us. It was nice having all of them over.

From left to right, Malia, you in Mommy’s arms, Uriah, Auntie Mary, Bo, Julius, Jared and Trey.

June 28th, Aslin’s big brothers flew into town. Julius and Jared Christenson, aka the Baby Whisperers, were able to get Aslin to stop crying in her car seat for 5 minutes, which is very helpful. Cause daddy can’t do anything when he’s driving and Aslin only wants mommy to hold her. Julius’ first thoughts about his sister was, “Wow I can’t believe we have have another family member. I can’t wait to play with her.” Jared said, “She’s so cute! I can’t wait to hold her and play with her.”

It’s been a slow day at work today, so I got to thinking about what it’s been like being a father to a newborn the past 8 weeks. First, let me say, it’s like nothing in the world that I’ve ever experienced.

When I look at Aslin, she just seems so amazing to me. I’m sure every parent knows what I mean. She is everything beautiful. She’s a little angel that I hold in my arms. Even when she cries. I don’t mind staying up at night holding her; rocking her; pacing the room with her in my arms. In fact, I love it. Even if she cries and I can’t get her to stop.

When I’m away at work, I can’t help thinking about holding her. I miss her so much. I feel like I’m missing out on the milimeters that she grows when I’m away. When I come home, it seems like she’s grown so much. What if she happens to say “Da da” for the first time and I’m not there? What happens if she starts crawling and I’m at my desk at work, or in a meeting? I miss it! I can’t imagine missing it. What a cruel world when in order to take care of your love ones, you have to be away and possibly miss one of those landmark events in your child’s life! That’s how I feel. Now I know that she hasn’t done any of those things yet, given that she’s only 8 weeks old and that she’s probably at home right now, crying her lungs off as Denise trys to soothe her; and that all I’m really missing is her crying, nursing and sleeping.

But …

See … Two nights ago, Aslin screamed on the top of her lungs. She was upset over something that we had no clue as to what. Normally her crying is in the tenor range, but this was beyond soprano. It was right in that range right before which a human can’t hear. How it rends your heart and ears. At this point, Denise held her, rocked her, tried to nurse her, and tried to soothe her. But nothing worked. Apparently, she was upset most of the day and Denise had barely gotten any sleep the night before and was extremely tired. So I asked Denise to let me hold her, reasoning that if she was not going to cry with Denise, Denise might as well get some sleep and let her cry with me. So I held her, letting Denise get a head start on some sleep. I tried everything Denise tried, sans the nursing. I sang to her, hummed when I couldn’t remember the words, which was often, and I rubbed her back.

Looking down at her, even with tears starting to well between her closed eyelids, a frown on her brow and her pouting lips, I thought “God I am blessed to have such a beautiful, healthy child. Thank you for letting experience such a treasure. Thank you for surrounding me with all these loving people and her amazing mother.” And she stopped crying. Holding her in my clumsy arms with her head resting on the center of my chest, rocking in our clunky, squeaky glider with the blankey that her mother made for her covering both of us, she fell asleep. I can comfort my baby girl! It’s not the first time that I was able to stop her from crying, but most of the time she wants her mom, and usually it take an hour of crying for her to stop when I have her.

So maybe … maybe she just wanted to be with daddy. Now that may or may not be true, but I’d like to think so, since I’m away from her most of the day. So maybe, when I hold her up as she tries to stand up and look around, and then she looks at me and smiles, that that smile isn’t gas from trying to burp and that she is really, truely happy to see me. Happy that I’m a part of her life. Happy that I’m her daddy.